Category: This Writer’s Life

Just One Last Time…

Just One Last Time…

Today I read King’s The Stand and

For the first time I felt their pain,

You died a week ago and my life

Will never be the same,

I exist

Through the good days and bad,

The ups and the downs…

Oh, how they threaten to drown!

My mind in a fog,

My emotions on hold,

I never knew

How much I loved you

Until you were gone,

I wonder,

Does one ever get past this pain,

This suffocating sense of loss?

I love you, Mom,

Wish you were here,

Just one last time with

Your laughter and smiles,

We could journey down roads unknown,

Just you and me, how much fun it would be,

We could picnic at the end of our miles!

I love you, Mom. Rest in Peace

Copyright – 2015 – Ingrid Foster

Where’s Your Box?

Where’s Your Box?

Is This Your Box?

 

Talking to my husband the other day, I told him I envision a room full of tables and around each table women and girls, mothers and daughters, aunts and nieces, grandmothers and granddaughter. And I am presenting on stage.

Your Power

“Do you remember a time?” I ask. “When you felt powerful? When you felt like you could do anything, be anything and no one could stop you?”

“Do you know, you still can?”

“Sure, we’ve gotten older, our skin is not so pliable, our bodies not as flexible, but our minds, our minds are still young and that power within us is still there. We just have to find new ways to work with these bodies that have aged or changed in some capacity.

Your Box

“So, this is what I want you to do. I want you to sit up straight in your chairs, look straight ahead and close your eyes. Now imagine a box, just an ordinary box, it can big, really big, or as small as you are. But every box has two things in common, they are square like a cube and they close at the top.

“Now you can decorate your box anyway you’d like inside your mind, but what I want you to do is imagine that that box is your life and you are living inside that box. Everything you do, every thought you have and every dream you dream for your life must fit inside that box.

Your Life

“No. No. No. These aren’t my rules. They’re yours. Unless you’re living a life where dreams can and do come true, you are currently living inside a box. And you’re life will never change.

“Do you know why? Because you don’t want your life to change.  You like your box, you like your walls and how familiar they feel. And that’s fine, if you’re happy and content and you never want your life to change. But, if you’re not happy and you’re living to please someone else. It’s up to you to change.

“I won’t lie to you, going outside your box is scary and unfamiliar. It takes courage to move outside what’s familiar. It also takes faith.

Your Choice

“Sure, faith in God, faith in your higher power, but also faith in yourself. You have to believe you can do it, and you have to believe you deserve it. Once you get past that voice inside you that says, “You can’t do this. You’re too dumb. or you’re too weak, or dreams, especially yours, will never come true. Or, maybe, it’s just because you’re too busy taking care of everyone else and it’s selfish for you to think about what you want.

“But, I have to tell you. You deserve to be happy as much as everyone else. Now mommas and grandmothers and aunts and sisters and daughters and everyone else look across the table at the person you came here with tonight. I want you to say, “You’re allowed to take care of yourself. You’re allowed to be good to yourself. Your allowed to love yourself. And then, I want you to tell the other person, you don’t have to live in a box. Together we can tear down those walls.

“Well done, Ladies. So, now I want you to take that piece of paper on the table in front of you and I want you to write a number one. Beside that number one I want you to write something you can do today to start breaking free of your box.

Taking That First Step

It can be as simple or as complex as you want. But, if you are really serious about getting out of that box, I want you to start off with something you can do, really do, today. Because if you can accomplish one goal today, tomorrow you work on number two.

“Baby steps, Ladies. Mothers, do you remember when your child was a baby. Do he or she start walking overnight? Probably not, can they walk now? Do you get what I’m saying?

“Every goal starts with a dream and every dream is accomplish by you taking that first step and then your second step and your third and so on. So, Ladies, let’s start getting you out of that box!”

 

An Ode to That First Cup

An Ode to That First Cup

(with tongue in cheek)

On the horizon, the sun breaks

Chasing the darkness of the night,

With sleepy minds and slow bodies

We stumble from our bed, hopeful

Yet searching,

 WHERE IS IT?

Where is that savoir to the sleep-starved,

Where is that first cup, that first sip

Where is that glorious elixir

we call…

 COFFEE

With each sip energy flows through

Our bodies, invigorating

our muddled minds, restoring

thought, inspiring synapsis

and we become

ALIVE

We are ready to face that

Which mere moments before

was

UN-FACE-ABLE

Get out of my way, World,

With this life-giving potion,

I can do ANYTHING

I AM INVINCIBLE!

Thank you, Coffee

 

Copyright 2017

Splintered Love No More…

Splintered Love No More…

The Sad Demise of Splintered Love

 

I am sad to say, Author S.J. Hermann has ended the existence of his amazing dark-love collection, Splintered Love.

Now for the good news. The stories will live on, each available as a single story!

Coming Soon to Amazon

Leap of Faith – Could one find true love again and if you can, what if it came from an unusual place.

Inner Beauty – Today’s society is based on a person’s looks and not what they carry on the inside.

Desperate Souls – What would you be willing to give up for love?

Reckless Thoughts – You find your true love, then you carelessly throw it away.

Forever Love – Love is eternal.

 

From my interview with S.J. Hermann, an excerpt from my personal favorite, “Leap of Faith.”

For more on S.J. Hermann, including his amazing series soon to be on the big screen, The Morium Trilogy

Website: www.authorsjhermann.wordpress.com

Twitter: @Writing_Novel

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SJ-Hermann-250758318466659/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/s.j.hermannwriter/

Google Plus: https://plus.google.com/+SJHermann

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9784255.S_J_Hermann

This Pleasure of Music

This Pleasure of Music

This Pleasure of Music

I go to the well and drink
My soul quenched, my spirit at peace
As each note fills my senses,
I sit here absorbed in its beauty,
Oneness envelops me,
There is no negativity, I know only joy,
I wonder, why do I hesitate to enter this realm?
This garden, this forest, this world of light and serenity,
Silent I sit in wonderment as the music caresses me,
Relaxes the tension that once tighten me,
I am one, happy, as the melodious waves consume me
Filling my deepest inner recesses,
This world, this pleasure of music.

Strength

Strength

Strength

I search the embers for the home I knew,
For the life I once had,

There deep in the rumble lies my silver-plated music box,
A gift cherished, now destroyed,
Over there, yes, near that fallen cross beam
Is the meat tray from my mother’s china,
Even in the wet ashes the roses are still fresh,
Too bad the platter is broken,

That’s the story of my life, I am alive
But my memories are gone,
Burned away in the still of a cold, dark night,

“Oh, what’s the use,” I say to myself, if only
I had been consumed in the fire with that antique sofa,
My favorite place to lay reading a cherished book,
Now gone, all gone… And I must start over?
I’m 83 years old, how am I supposed to start over?

Across the wreckage the sun is rising in the east
Just it always has,
That old dependable sun giving me another morning,
A new day,

As its first golden rays creep across the dark ash
They catch a reflection, a burst of brightness,
There in the depth of black soot I dig,

It’s a picture, an old photo of a man’s smiling face,
The man I once called my own, he had always
Stood by me, holding me, supporting me,

And with that frame held to my breast, I knew,
Together, I had the strength to go one.

A Leap of Faith

A Leap of Faith

A Leap of Faith

I am standing on the edge, a precipice,
My world spread out before me, a vast, open canyon,
Do I take a step, perhaps a leap, of faith?

Or do I step back, away from the edge
And move to safer, more familiar ground?
It is easy to take the path more traveled
And return to a life planned for me,

But I have never been one to follow the herd,
No, I’ve always favored the road less traveled,
Moving on my own, the destination unknown,
Unmapped by those few who’ve gone before me,

But this world, this vast unknown frightens me,

I remind myself, fear is a known enemy,
For years I have faced it, head on, refusing to back down,
Not  bowing to its intimidation,

So why should I give in now? Age?
I am getting older, is this journey a path
For the young, their lives uncharted before them?

My God girl, you’re only fifty, why are so afraid?
Do you want to sit in a cubicle, working hard
For someone else, putting their lives, their wants
Ahead of your dreams, your goals, your desires?

Or do you take the risk and face your fear?

Your life is ahead of you, not behind you,
To deny yourself your future, is taking a step
Backwards, and that’s not you,

You are brave, courageous and strong,
Take a step, live, dare to dream, be you,
You were not meant to be boxed in,

Don’t put yourself in chains tied
To another’s dreams, force feeding their egos,
While you are sucked dry, slowly dying inside,
Your feet stuck on their path, not your own,

Remember fear is an enemy to be defeated,
Leap, child, leap, keep your eyes forward,
For yours is the world ahead not behind.

For Ammie ~ Forevermore

For Ammie ~ Forevermore

Forevermore

My world shattered when I was nine

You left me one last time,

I stood on the sofa and watched the lights

Swirl bright and red and I knew you were gone,

I cried and cried, I yelled and yelled,

You were my rock and then you were gone,

We went to the viewing, my family and I

So many people, all strangers,

And then there it was, a large metal box,

Inside was a body, all pasty and pale

Dressed in your finest dress, a flowered blue,

The eyes were closed with a look of peace

And I told everyone it wasn’t you,

If it had been you, you’d hold out your arms to me

Encircling me in your love’s security

When my parent’s fought, your bed was my haven

You were my shield, my advocate and then, you were gone,

Days later as I wept, missing you, you came to me

You held me once more in peace and serenity

You wiped my tears and gave me joy

Just like before and I knew you would be with me

Forevermore.

Your Legacy

Your Legacy

Your Legacy

For years, I watched you, learned from you,

You were my father, my role model,

For good or bad, right or wrong, indifferent,

Emotionally, you were luke-warm,

Physically, strong, determined, stoic,

Burying your pain, your sorrow and even loss

Deeper and deeper, inside you,

Do I mourn for you now?

In truth, I never knew you,

But I do mourn, not for you but, rather

What could have been, the relationship

We never had, the open, honest and even loving

Father-Daughter bond we could have shared,

Even today, when I think of you, I feel nothing

Perhaps that was what you intended, all along.

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